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7 Common Characteristics of a Nairobi Slay queen

by Hillary Raini

Slay can mean “to kill a person or animal,” “to make someone laugh,” “to have sex with someone,” or “to do something spectacularly well,” especially when it comes to fashion, artistic performance, or self-confidence.

 In today’s era where social media is the order of the day a slay queen  has been quoted as  basically a diva, mostly from urban locations, that has reason to believe she is every man’s eye candy and the envy of every other woman.

She believes that women of her kind are superior and should thus be treated as such. However,others define slayqueens as Young and naive girls who apparently do not date broke men.

They spend hours on Snapchat and Instagram showing off things they don’t even own. Others may say Girls who do not have a wealthy background but appear as if they do.

They use malicious acts to attain cash, drink expensive alcohol, procure expensive cellphones. But back at home she’s a chicken chaser.

Here are the most common characteristics of a Kenyan (nairobian)Slayqueen

1. Blue ticks

Slay queens can ignore your texts untill you think twice about your phone.is it my phone that is a problem or iPhones don’t receive texts from cheap Android phones . It’s like your text is a Safaricom message or that “nitumie hizo pesa kwa hii number” message from a Kamiti inmate. You just keep seeing the slay queen of your dreams online most of the time, but she doesn’t respond, because she has “options.” – lots of options.However if u want a live action of The just concluded stone throwing party at kibera by-elections , Fail to respond to her texts . Slay queens have extreme double standards in life. A slay queen can’t stand waiting for a guy for 10 minutes for example. On the other end, she doesn’t see a big deal in being two hours late while the sun is playing bazokizo with you pale archives

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2. Taking pictures with their legs curved and lots of filters

Look at the pictures of most slay queens and you might think they are suffering from Rickets – the condition that causes bowed legs in some children. Slay queens are obsessed with pictures and when she makes you her photographer, you’ll have to keep repeating the shots untill she is satisfied..she will pick one picture out of the possible kanyari (310) that u have taken. Note the saying vitu kwa ground ni different ..she will appear on a date looking different than what she has been sending in your dm.

3. Life of the party

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A slay queen believes that being an obnoxious. shisha-loving party girl is all part of the good life. Despite the fact that she’s puked in all the washrooms of all Kenyan clubs, a slay queen will pretend to be too cool for local music. Ask her if she’s heard Timmy Tdat’s latest song and she’ll be like “Ati Timmy Tdat? Who’s that? I don’t do local music and when a gengeton track drops she twerks her soul out while shouting to the lyrics as though she was in a football pitch supporting Gor mahia

4. Accent

Slay queens tweng harder than PLO Lumumba. All their speeches are littered with phrases such as “Wharreva”, “So cute”, “Do I look fat?”,”I’m done with..” and “Oh my gosh” depending on the mood. Despite the slay queen’s penchant for accents, she has very poor grammar.  A slay queen doesn’t know the difference between your and you’re, I’m and Am, as well as many other English connotations. She never will. And she will be offended if you point that out.

5.Outrageous preferences for men

Slay queens have crazy standards when it comes to the kind of men they want, even when they don’t deserve such men at all. They believe that only the best of the best will suffice for their romantic life. My guy if u dont stay in kile lavi or Westlands hauna Chako more so if u don’t drive.  Money is number one for a slay queen, with looks a close second. A slay queen doesn’t care if her boyfriend is smart or a decent human being , so long as he looks cool and has some cash. And as long as he’s buying her Guarana at Kiza. And as long as she can talk to her girls about her boyfriend who buys her Guarana at Kiza, she’s happy

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6. Oversharing on social media

A slay queen likes to over share with everyone on social media. She is out there trying to make others feel inferior and peer pressured by fake material things .. she will post “the weekend has begun.”, work hard enjoy life,” “depressed,” slaying “That amazing feeling when you get home and take off your bra,”men are thrash “My puppy died…..so sad ? RIP Toto….you were so adorable.”

7. Dumbness

A slay queen will know what is the name of Kim Kardashian’s cousin’s sister or what was the color of cardi B’s dress on a post she posted three months ago but she has no idea where Syria is, or what’s BBI.

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